I called in for a prescription today, and asked to speak to the nurse. “She don’t do it any more. I do it. I gonna need your medical record number.” I continued on with my please, thank you, and “ok, no problem”. Finally, I could detect a smile in her voice, and an effort to be cordial. With lessons in grammar, diction, and customer service, she might actually earn “Employee of the Month” by 2023.
Almost everyday I hear stories of disrespect, rudeness, and lack of integrity or values. People ask, “what is wrong with the world?” We have become de-sensitized to kindness, respect, and protocol. We might have been raised with values, but somewhere along the way our experiences, relationships, and the media has lead us to believe it is acceptable to treat folks any way we want to treat them.
I was on the elevator with my elderly mother in an apartment building occupied predominantly by students. When the elevator stopped on the main floor and the door opened, at least six young adults filed in without giving us the opportunity to get out first. I stood in the door, preventing it from closing on my mother (cane in hand), and the young ingrates acted as if I was their doorman. I stared blankly, took my mother’s arm dramatically and exited blocking the way of the last few mindless intellectuals (now there’s an oxymoron).
OEI allows us to bring a kind of Jerry Springer mindset into our lives. Absolutely anything and everything is acceptable. For instance, I admit to enjoying Facebook. People write things on that social network that should be locked away in a diary. They post pictures that should be in a drawer in their boudoir, that reveal things that make barfing a daily practice. It doesn’t matter that the news and parents have warned that employers use Facebook to learn more about job applicants. It’s not just the young people who say and post anything. It is people born in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s who are without an edit button. They find themselves amusing, and they have friends who promote their love of U & I.
I have my prude rules. I embrace them. Ninety percent of the young people I am friends with, I have known since childhood. Even as adults, I do not condone their use of profanity in my presence, nor do I permit them to call me by my first name. On Facebook, I block their information from appearing so that I do not have to see what they talk about on a daily basis. Only the few who have two pages (they don’t think I know that) are not blocked. That is because one page is usually suitable for general audiences and prudes like me. My daughter only extended friendship because she is never on that social network anymore. Fine.
Is anything important? Only when and if we are personally affected. Although it is primarily young people who seemed to have coined the phrase, “It’s not a big deal”, the attitude transcends across the generations. It’s no big deal. What’s it to you? Mind your own business. I can talk about you if I want to. Who are you? Get out of my way. F___ you. And it is all okay, because…”you aint my mama, you can’t tell me what to do”. Since the proverbial “mama” never told them, they are not going to listen to anybody else. Therefore, there is no “please and thank you”, no “may I.?”, no “excuse me”. The music is loud and rebellious, just as it has been in almost every generation . However, the language is more explicit, more disrespectful to women, children, and everyone. A great beat or hook and musical prowess has a passport to enter into our cars, and homes. Even if it is not allowed to be played, it is in their minds. They write it, say it, preach it, and live it. As a lover of music, I understand the entrapment. I find myself singing along with songs with questionable lyrics. I use the same rationale, I like the music, the voice, the skills, and I am not listening to the words so much. However, I know that we are products of our environment, a mesh of media, and culture.
Still, as children, my generation was taught the difference between our own lives and what was depicted in our music. There were dances we were not permitted to do at certain ages, words we could not say, and music we could not listen to in our homes. Some things should not change with time. Some things do not need improvement.
In my humble Barbaraism, we still need to pray, and yes, in schools. We still need chivalry. Men should stand up, when we enter the room, sit at the dining table, etc. Little boys should learn to remove their hats, so that they know this as a man. Make your child get up and offer their seat to an adult. Make them be quiet when adults are talking or leave the room, if they are very young. We should respect others AND their property. That means not taking, destroying, or misusing others or their property. THERE IS LITTLE RESPECT FOR OLDER ADULTS, WOMEN OR NEIGHBORS.
When we get lax with the very rules that demand respect of others, we end up with the rampant disease OEI. Please stop it from spreading. If you have been exposed, quarantine yourself from the rest of us. We want to live in a pollution free environment, and your ignorance is killing us.
